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Reasons or Rationalizations: Wisdom Versus Delusion for Interpersonal Relationships
Are your behaviors and attitudes toward others based on wisdom or poor self-serving rationalizations?
Conflicts are inevitable whenever people interact with others. How people approach and resolve these conflicts determines the quality and durability of their relationships.
A completely selfish person will demand what they want and manipulate others to obtain it. They don’t feel the need to justify their actions. Such an approach leads to shallow relationships that fail to endure because people don’t like to be used and abused with impunity.
To avoid a steady turnover of people in their lives, most people will at least try to offer justifications for their actions. Since selfish behavior is difficult to justify in a way that satisfies others, people come up with rationalizations to make them look less selfish, often fooling even themselves.
Selfish brutes often don’t see themselves as self-centered abusers even when they are. They lie to themselves to make their lies more convincing to others and to placate their guilt over their bad behavior. Some of the most pernicious lies are the ones we tell ourselves.
